The sneeze of God

The best riddle i have ever heard...... (Got it through an email, on my office ID today)

If you meet God, and he sneezes, what do you say to him?

Reply 1:
Bless Thyself!!!!

Reply 2:
Stop sneezing. There are enough hurricanes already. No need for more.

Reply 3:
I didnt know you can catch a cold, God. Is there any coldarin in heaven?

Reply 4:
I didnt understand the riddle.

The 4th reply came from a person in my office who was working busily.....I went upto his desk and asked him what he was doing......He mumbled something absent mindedly and I thought it was best that he be left alone with his work. As i turned my back on him, I sneezed loudly.................
He winced and said "God bless you"!!!

Restrooms

So there was this new employee......his name is Mr D. Mr. D joined office a few days ago. As a new employee he was given a form to fill up. It was a strange sort of form which had all sorts of questions like ......Do you know who ur mentor is? Do you know where the office canteen is located? Do you know who is your group head? etc.....I hadnt filled one like that when i joined the company.....Thought that it must be some new concept of our HR and admin department who don't have any better jobs than to think of such so called 'HR policies'. So anyway.....this new employee answered all the questions correctly except for one. He asked me......"Can you tell me where employees can take a break? Maybe lie down or sleep for some time if they are feeling ill?" I told him that i often slept on my office chair and sometimes also during meetings on conference room chairs and that u didnt need a room just for sleeping in office at least!!!
I then saw his form and found out what the question was.............

Do you know where the restrooms of your office are located?

Was this ignorance? Or the funny language called 'English'?
Both.........I'd say.....

Do you have photos of your best friends?

Had an 'overnight' stay at my place with my friends yesternight. For the first time in the history of 'nightouts'......I shot a video with my newly aquired handycam. I realised after i watched the video that, somehow...............somehow............i have very few photos with the best of my friends!!
It is ridiculous and strange to actually realise this now, especially when you know that the very same guys have been with you for so many years, been together at these 'nightouts' and during all the evenings when you meet them. Apparently its because we took each others presence for granted and no one really bothered to have a 'best friends group photo'. And we realise it now because a stage has come when every member of the group has taken up their own career path and has to go places for work. Its an ideal farewell gift to a best friend, going to some other place to give him a video CD which has all these memories recorded in it, aint it?
So anyway, I shot a video...........and its come out real funny.........A sincere thanks to 3 of my best friends......KJC, RAA and IAK............for that....
KJC for giving your best facial expressions and beating RAA with that pillow.......which were skillfully captured by my practised Handycam hand....
RAA for throwing in that funny 'BOOO' sound in the dark and his crazy antics behind KJC's back.....
IAK for doing what he does best at 3 am at night outs.............sleepzzzzzz!!! that too in completely odd positions !!!!
YOU GUYS are the best!!!
Wish that some of my other best pals were here at my place too yesternight..........OV, AR, JRS, NNA and MS!!!

Whos you? Weight watcher or mass builder?

Why is it difficult for an underweight person to gain weight even if he eats like 'obelix' and still difficult for an overweight person to lose weight at all even if he eats an 'ant's' diet?

Is there an overweight person here in this big fat world who does NOT think it is more easier to gain weight than to lose it or an underweight person who does 'NOT' think it is more easier to lose weight than to gain it?

Probably not.

None of the above? Yeah you're lucky, then!!!

Fears.

There is no one without fears. Fear of the darkness, fear of heights, fear of water, fear of closed spaces. Some fear the elements and still others fear the living. I have known people who have hunted down a wild bear and have cowered, knocked knees and pissed their pants in front of their own father!!! Most of us fear the unknown. 'Unknown' could be ghosts, aliens landing on planet earth, paranormal activity and even the force we call 'God'. Fear of unknown could also mean fear of what would happen in future, to self, family, friends. It is perhaps, fear which keeps us alive, which helps us be cautious, take preventive steps before danger leaps out and takes its chances. When fear takes command, for a moment, you cannot move, nor can you think.

Fears can also hamper our progress. It is said that to achieve success you have to conquer your fears, first. And for that you have to face your fears, face it and stare right back at it, and fight it and vanquish it!! This is easier said than done. isnt it? But then what isnt?

Darr hi sabse bada rog hai - A quote on fear by the great 'Mahatma Gandhi'

Mummy, Mummy bhoonk lagi.........bas do minute!!!

This post is dedicated to one of my favourite snacks. A wet rainy day or a cold and chilly wintry evening is just the ideal weather to have a bowl of 'Maggi Noodles'. Kudos to the man / woman who invented maggi noodles. For most of the people in mumbai (or everywhere in india i'd like to think) Maggi is synonymous with 'noodles'. Obviously the reason being that in India Maggi Noodles are the only kind of Noodles for most of the people. Back then when we were kids, the meaning of Maggi for us was 'Noodles'. Or rather, we knew of Maggi before we knew that they were noodles. Such lies the fame of 'The Maggi Noodles' in india. Maggi is actually a subbrand of Nestle. It covers a large range of products such as Maggi sauce, Maggi seasoning cubes, Maggi soups etc. 'Maggi' was brought into existence in 1872 in Swizterland by a man called Julius Maggi. Wikipedia has some interesting facts on 'Maggi' I came to know of the above fact from wiki too. Earlier we used to get 'Maggi noodles' in different flavours. I remember Capsica, a very popular flavour back then. Pity it was discontinued. Then there was masala, which is still available, there is chicken (Dont know why it is called chicken?). There are also two new types, recently launched, Atta noodles and mania. Atta noodles is good. Havent tried 'Mania' (I got scared by the name and never really felt like buying it!!!) The best part of maggi is that its instant and is pretty filling. Not that it'll bloat your stomach. One packet of maggi is a perfect snack. Procedure of making it is rather simple. I think you just boil some 1 1/2 cups of water and.............i dont remember the rest of the recipe........i think its written in the back of the packet, simple isnt it?!!! (hahahaha!!!) So here is the maggi mantra..........

Mummy, Mummy Bhoonk lagi...................

Bas Do minute...........
and then u see a hot steaming bowl of maggi in mom's hand................WOW!!!! YUMMY!!!

Huh?

There are times in life when certain events take a totally different turn. On hearing the developments you are dumbstruck. You dont know whether you are surprised or 'shocked'. You start wondering......Is it a dream? Or did i have too much cheese last night? (So that this is a bizarre dream due to effects of overeating?) You forget for a brief period what is happening. During this brief period there is a likelihood that you might do something very absent minded like..... holding your mobile phone like a computer's mouse and moving it around. Such is the state of your mind, that you'll expect the cursor to move!!!! You might also do something silly at these times...like keep your mouth open in surprise!! There was one such news today that left me dumbstruck today....my friends might be knowing about it....