Waiting for a change that never came........

I have felt that, there is some thing, which should have been different than what it is today. I have worked hard, gave sweat, blood and tears, and tried my level best to change it, but to no avail. It remains as it is. I prayed hard, hoping that some day it will change. But it seemed like God was being unfair to me and the prayer fell on deaf ears. I felt bad, went mad with anger, got frustrated, even depressed at some point of time. I was patient, I was optimistic, I had hopes, but that ray of light never came, it never gave me joy, never illuminated my path. It simply rejected me. It simply dodged my way as if daring me to change it. People were harsh on me, they didnt care about what they said about it or who they were saying it in front of. So many of them misunderstood and gave superficial judgements.....never thinking for a moment how I must have been hurt by it. In the end, I learnt that, that one thing would never change. It is like a lifelong and permanent wound which cannot be healed. I have to stop being bothered by it, I have to accept it at its face value and to ultimately laugh it off every time, I am reminded that it will never vary. Nobody would be able to make out what that one 'thing' is, that I want to change, by reading this post. But anyway......I dont expect people to understand what it is........because nobody has really understood what it means to me and how deep the wound runs.