Punching bag.

I saw a punching bag in the gym today. And for some reason it reminded me of myself. Hmm......I wonder why???

There is light at the end of the tunnel I know

There is light at the end of the tunnel I know,
Never have I seen it, though.

The tunnel has been dark and cold,
And the walls are covered in slime and mould.
If only there was someone who could hold,
A light for me and make me bold.

Still, there is a light at the end of the tunnel I know,
Never have I seen it though.

I feel blind and nowhere to go,
And long for the sunshine and the glow,
Outside, where the rivers and rivulets flow,
And the trees and flowers blossom and grow.

And I walk on, because, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, I know
Never have I seen it though.

-By me.

Mixed emotions.

I feel like writing and yet am at a loss of topic. There were a lot of emotions going through my mind on this day. And for once laughter took a side seat with all others. Monday morning started with the usual phonecalls, people requiring work to be done on priority basis. I answered everyone politely, did all the work and generally, behaved as the usually good boy that I am in the office. That was the somber part of my emotions. Unaffected, unflappable and essentially quite cool !! (I flatter myself saying this.) Then told my boss that I would leave half day, which gave rise to his usual bickerings:

Me: Sir, I am leaving half day for Ganapati visarjan.
Boss: Oh no !! Why do you always do this? There was important work today you know.
Me: Correct. And I have finished it already. Apart from that, my leave record is great.
Boss: Even I have ganapati at home.
Me: You can go too, cant you, boss?

That backtalk was greatly satisfying. I am one believer in Lord Ganesh and the strength he gives us !!! So there was anger and aggression from my side.

Ganapati visarjan is one sad affair. Its hardly a day we get to see the idol at home, when its time to take it away !!! Sadness at immersion.

Later on, met a friend after a long time, talked to him felt good. Later on we met with other friends. Caught up and had some fun laughing and chatting. Happiness.

One more thing which I fail to recall, brought up some strong emotions. Now I cant remember it like I usually forget dreams !! When I do recall, I'll write it down.

The smiling face of muthu.

A few years ago a friend of mine explained to me the concept of positive energies and negative energies in people. Although I didnt exactly 'rubbish' or 'balderdash' his theory, I didnt quite give it a second thought or rather, listened to him in an offhanded sort of way. After all belief is different for different people and freedom of expression means anyone can say whatever he / she believes. But these days, I have actually started observing that a living person does 'radiate' positive or negative energies. Also, I think that a smiling face or the ability to smile or laugh a lot imparts a person with positive energies. (This is my opinion and I know a lot may find it stupid or highly biased.)
One of my investment consultants is such, that the day I decided to invest my money through his agency, I couldnt help thinking that he wouldnt lose my money or couldnt help thinking that he would always give me the correct advice as to which investment schemes to put my money in or where not to put it. The investment agent's name is muthu and he has a smiling face.
Same is the case with one of my friends, who has a smiling face. You cant help but trust such people.
One of my seniors in office, doesnt laugh a lot or smile, but still encourages people and never creates bad vibrations. I have this feeling of 'he's always there to solve the problems which I cannot handle.' (Although, I havent had such problems till date !!)
Another of my seniors, is the boring type, slow and the 'always complaining' types. I feel 'ill' when I am in his company.

Point of saying all this is (without the greatest of examples.) that there are some people who are very positive and have a 'we'll take care of everything that comes our way' attitude towards life. Hence, they are always generally happy and keep radiating this positivity, the mere reason being that the positive energy is a projection of our 'general happiness'.
Dont worry, be happy.

From RCF to Allahabad..

I know this seems to be a funny title to the post. But I'd prefer to remember the two as, being related. I remember our very first 'official visits' to the RCF industrial facility at Trombay. Our final year engineering project required us to go to RCF every monday. And although our final year project title was 'Installation and commissioning' of a certain plant, we did neither......install nor commission. In fact my fondest memories of those 'official visits' were only eating out at the nearest 'Jhama' after 'working'.
Recently, I was sent to a vendor's works facility in Allahabad in Uttar Pradesh for some 'real official work' from my office. (This was quite unlike the college final year project trips....there was real work to be done and eating out wasnt going to be the real objective !!!). I left Mumbai on Friday evening. Checked in my luggage at mumbai domestic. Reached IGI domestic 2 hours later and booked a pre paid taxi. It was my first time in new delhi. Weather around this time is hot, if not raining. The roads were truly amazing in New Delhi, at least in the part through which I travelled. The taxi which I got was a horrible looking thing, it looked like it had been bumped at least a dozen times and vibrated so much that I checked the underseat for any artificial massaging devices. Moreover, the driver was determined to give me a 'joyous, roller-coaster like ride'. He speeded up when he saw a speed breaker and I am quite sure that you have to do the opposite !!! I was all rickety by the time I reached New delhi station, from where, after dining at a nearby place, I sat down in the Prayagraj express, and the train left for allahabad. It reached Allahabad in the morning time at around 7. I came to the gates and was immediately surrounded by cycle-rickshawallas. But I found the car that was supposed to take me to the Hotel. On the way, I realised that Allahabad looked more like a town than a city (like many other indian cities!!) . Of course, it is a city and it has its own university. The significance of Allahabad lies in the fact that the three big rivers....Ganga, Yamuna and Saraswati meet at Allahabad. The meeting of the three rivers is known as sangam (Every time we travelled to the vendor's works there, we passed on a bridge, built over the sangam, which was a very impressive, two pillar suspension bridge.) The Hotel was very nice and after sleeping for about an hour and having breakfast, the car dropped us at the place where we had work. Now, here came the real fun. It was a very 'conventional' type of office. We were invited to a conference room where there was a clear inch of dirt on the horse-shoe shaped table. The chairs were such that each time you sat on one of them, a castor would come off !!! There was an old black and white TV (No projector) and an old black board. It reminded me of one of our bigger school classrooms. Once you got used to this very old idea conference room, there were coolers, which circulated hot air because they werent supplied enough water !!! The managers cabins were worst, with notice boards being stuck on opaque window frames. The cabin door was fixed up with a hydraulic closing apparatus, which closed the door slowly. But since the door hinges didnt seemed to be oiled regularly, the doors creaked till they closed and just a centimeter before the door closed completely the hydraulics would disengage and the door would close with a loud 'thud' which rattled all those notice boards and disturb their 'straight line' alignment. In cabins too, the chairs were broken, but atleast they didnt have castors. People here were completely 'cool'. It seemed that, only 4-5 people worked in that office. Rest all would be found in the same position in the evening as they were in the mornings and be found doing no work at all !!!. People came to the conference room after lunch quite often, as it was open, when we 'customers' had come and it was cooler in the conference room. Once or twice I even spotted people nodding their heads and sleeping completely inside the officers cabins. The official closing time was 5 PM. Since the gate was a bit away from the main office building, people started off at 5 minutes to 5 itself, so that they would reach the gate at exactly 5 where they would punch out their attendance !!! I have never before seen such 'cool' or 'slow' working atmostphere.
Every morning we used to leave the hotel at 0930 hrs and reach the vendor's works at 1000hrs. I worked in this office for 5 days and expedited 5 months pending work !! So you can imagine how slowly these people must be working!!
Me and another fellow from the client side were first time visitors for allahabad, and so on a holiday decided to visit the sangam. The river bed is huge and you have to get to the sangam in a boat. The people here can take you for a ride, in the boat and also where money is concerned. We paid the boatman Rs 450 for a ride. We gave him Rs 450 and not more than that (Even Rs 450 is too much). I dont want to hurt any more 'yatri sentiments' and wont say more on this part. Finally our work got over on thursday and we left at 9.30 Pm by the prayagraj express. Reached Delhi, at 0700 and had to catch a plane at 1115. So roamed around a bit on the IGI domestic, saw some pretty looking dames, checked in, boarded the plane. The famous bollywood actor Mr. Anupam Kher was on the same plane as I was. Stepped down from the airport bus beside him. Didnt shake hands with him, though. No reason why.
All in all quite a memorable trip, in terms of seeing new people.

Memories...once again.

Today, as I was going through my little, 4 month old, niece's (my sibling sister's daughter) photos, I could'nt help remnicising about the summer holidays we used to spend in pune at my uncle's and grandparents' place.
My mother has a younger brother, who's my uncle (obviously) just like my case, where I have an elder sister, who has a younger brother, that is me. Her daughter is my niece and I am her uncle, just like I have my uncle (I couldnt have made it simpler !! hehehe!!).
So anyway, its like I said, my sister and I spent almost all our school summer holidays at pune. My uncle was a fitness freak (still is, as a matter of fact.). He had played cricket for the state and the west zone. And he was into muscle building. He used to take us to the S.P college ground in pune. (S.P college is a famed college in pune and the organization which runs this college 'Shikshan prasarak mandali' also govern other colleges like Podar college in matunga, welingkar institute in dadar.). S.P college ground had a gymnasium, which was a typical 'old school' type of gym. The gymnasium building was old, and had a thatched roof structure. It had a side entrance into an open verandah which served as a sort of entrance gate to the main ground and doubled up as a pavilion. The building was at a metre elevation from the ground. Once you climbed the stairs to the elevated verandah from a side door, you could see the full ground from that position. A declining set of stairs led you down onto the ground. The amazing part about public ground or private maidans is that you'll see so many games being played, so many teams playing side by side, different people in different coloured clothes....some playing football in shorts and colourful jerseys, some very 'official' looking cricketers in full whites, some in just shorts and bare chested having a round of volleyball, some in tracks and sports tees jogging. It used to be fun just watching them, at times !! There was even a sand pit on the ground for practicising long jump. Our uncle had bought us each, a nice pair of track pants and shirts and a jacket to be worn after we had finished our exercises. He used to take us (me and my sister) for a jogging round, a small round, which seemed very big at that time and by the time we finished our round, we used to be tired and all sweaty. After this round, my uncle used to go the gym building to have his workout. And we used to do some stretching exercises uncle had taught us. It was fun to see my sister, not being able to do some of the stretches, which I could easily perform !! My uncle had instructed us to wear our jackets for some time after jogging and exercising ("Put on your jackets after exercising, lads, otherwise the breeze blowing on the sweat will make you ill !!!", thats what he used to say !!). After that we used to sit on the verandah and observe the other 'sportsmen' on the ground. After some days, many people who were regulars were familiar with us two kids. There was workout instructor who used to give free weights training to a few potential 'body builders'. He was an old, but big fellow with a long mustache. I always thought he was a retired colonel in the army (I had the funny impression, at that time, that army colonels had long mustaches !!). 'Sir' they used to call him. I was always scared of him and remember being afraid of going past him and into the door..... to go inside and call my uncle, whenever I felt he (my uncle) was taking too long at the gym !!! But he was a kind old man, not because of anything else, but after some days, when he was used to seeing us everyday, he gave us peppermints to eat, everyday !!
After my uncle came back from his workout, we used to head home.
Its was one of the simple things in life you enjoy and remember. Going to the ground with my uncle and the enjoyable hour and a half was one of them !!! The ground still exists, but they have changed the old building. Its been reconstructed.

Happiness of the stone age man !!!

Sometimes, I wonder whether technological and scientific development are so important ?
No doubt we have all the luxuries and the tools and techniques of doing work quickly, but then do we have to actually 'work' less even if we have all the necessary appliances? It is obvious that this is not the case. On the contrary, work has increased, lifestyles have changed for the worse, have become more hectic and tiring, relationships strained, overall health has declined, even though recorded death rate has decreased. Our happiness has become materialisitic and whether you like it or not, it has to be that way, if you want to stay in the race. We have even started spoiling nature and its resources in the process. We have evolved so much , yet, looking at the bigger picture called life, we have gained little and are fast approaching nothingness. It makes me wonder....Was stone age man happier, even though he probably didnt know the meaning of happiness?

Strange times, strange people.

These days, in times of recession, when no one is much loaded with work, I have learnt to appreciate how many 'namoonaas' there are in office. We have a fellow, who coughs a lot in the morning times. But its not one of those normal coughs that you have during a cold. Its smoker's cough and the 'noise' that he 'produces' is both loud and disgusting. In fact, it sounds like he is being voilently sick (throwing up.) when he coughs. Today he produced such a variety of sounds, that I am actually thinking of recommending his name to a 'animal sound recording' studio man. He coughed in the morning, then yawned openly, belched loudly after having his lunch, stretched and groaned and then while leaving office hiccuped like a drunkard. What is he? A poor sick soul? or a disgusting bastard?

Then there is this one chap, who seems to come to office just to roam around and have tea, snacks and lunch. He never seems to be working and whenever I glance at his office PC, I can see social networking website pages. He takes a roaming round every afternoon in the office. Staring at everyone and their desks, he takes his own time observing people and their activities like a security guard. I swear he was one, in his last birth, or maybe he was in this birth itself !!! I dont know how the company has still retained him . Maybe because he's been in the company for a long time.....But I wonder what the company pays him for? For doing nothing from a long time???

Best days of life.

We grow up to be what kids call as grown-ups. Still, there is always the attraction of young age, of youthful behaviour and childlike lightheartedness. No one truly grows up. The child in us is always well and truly alive and it gets killed only the day you die. Being a kid, one hardly realises the golden period he / she is going through. Realization of it dawns only later, by which time, you have already forgotten what it was to be a kid. Some people brood over this too much, so much that they stop living their present life too !!! If this happens at each point of time, we are unlikely to be happy at all !! We humans just need to realise that every phase of life has its upsides and flipsides. Every moment of life can be enjoyed, if you stop cribbing about the fact, that things 'aren't what they used to be' and start discovering the new angles which exist now and which werent there before !!! I'd say, it was nice being a kid, but what the heck? After all, I hated studies. Work is better. At least there is no homework !!! And I get money for working...which I can spend.

Lessons learnt: Home alone

I have been home alone for almost 4 and a half months now. The day after tommorow, my parents return. During these 4 and a half months, I enjoyed full freedom in whatever I did. I could sleep, wake up at anytime I wanted (Not quite, of course, I had to go to office so freedom on long sleeping hours could be exercised only on weekends !!). I could go out for a snack, go out and eat ice creams and pastries whenever I wanted to, and could cook at home whenever I had a 'chef's whim'. To sum it all, I enjoyed my days as a totally free bird. I am looking forward to meeting my parents too, of course. But, I'll be fair enough to everyone and say this......These 4 and a half months, have been one of those 'memorable times' in life. A perfect stretch of time for being alone. Just enough so that you enjoy and not long drawn so that you dont get bored and lonely. A few of the things which I learnt while I was alone were:
1) Dont put the milk on the gas and go for a shit. Its never certain which completes first, the milk coming to a boil and rising or you completing your download and rising. However if the former event occurs first, you'll have another mess to clean up !!!

2) If a maid servant comes to do work at home, adjust your schedule as per her timings. It is most likely that she comes at the most inconvenient of times. My maid servant always came 15 minutes before I left for office. On top of it, she used to ask me everyday, "You are leaving early today, is it?". This made me retort, "I am not leaving early, you have come late."

3) You are most likely to miss the most important couriers. If you do miss one, hurry down to the courier company and collect the package, otherwise, they'll send it back to the orginating company !!

4) Make sure you dont get friendly with your boss and tell him about being home alone and doing all the housework. If you tell him that, expecting him to go easy on you, forget it !! He's not supposed to go easy on you. If anything he'll bring the roof down on you and derive a sadistic pleasure !!

5) Always remember to keep an extra set of keys outside the house. (Most of us do this even otherwise !!) The fact is, if you are alone at home, you are more likely to forget the keys home. No point in going for a night time walk in shorts and then discovering, outside the door of your house, that the keys are not in your pockets. You wont get a keymaker at night and you cant sleep out in the cold monsoons in just shorts.

6) Always sleep with a thick wooden stick at your bedside. If a burglar comes in and does not carry a gun, you could get him first. If its a false alarm and you are just dreaming of the house being robbed, not a problem.....even if you swing that stick subconciously, no one would get hurt because there is no one else in the house !!!

7) Make sure you set the alarm for the correct time. I once set the alarm for 0700 hours on a weekend !! (Hope you understand my frustration when I woke up !!)

8) Dont watch hindi horror movies at night when alone. I did so and could'nt sleep .............thats coz I was laughing the whole night.

9) Be ready to make some statements like "I am feeling very lonely" and "I am suffering a lot, I dont get good home made food." on the telephone, even if you are perfectly fine and enjoying a lot . Thats coz, people normally expect to hear all this, and if you tell them rubbish like "I am enjoying.", they dont think its normal. They'll think that you are taking undue advantage of your freedom and doing "bad things" in the house !!!!

All the best !!!

Believe in your dreams,
and one day they'll come true,

Believe in your happiness,
and you'll never be blue.

Believe in your family,
coz they'll never let you down.

Believe in laughter,
and you will never frown.

Believe in friendship,
And you'll never be alone.

Believe in love,
Your heart is not a stone.

Believe that life is tough,
And you'll find it breezy.

Believe in your abilities,
and everything's easy.

Believe in God,
who made us.

Believe in simplicity,
and dont create a fuss.

Believe in breaks,
Coz you need some rest.

Believe in luck,
All the best !!!

-By me.

Colours.

First things that come to my mind when I see these colours....

White: Peace, Pleasant, bright, radiant.
Black: Sexy, dark, cold, tunnel, Trousers
Green: trees, Mountains covered with greenery after the monsoons.
Blue: Sky, Windows XP, Formal shirts.
Yellow: Smiley emoticon, shit.
Pink: Vallentines day, ampicilin, gelusil antacid. (Ampicillin is an antibiotic used to treat bacterial infections....when I was younger it was once prescribed for me. Gelusil as we know is an anti acid medicine and provides relief from acidity !!)
Red: Blood, Vampires, love, lipstick.
Brown: Rust on iron.
Grey: Grandma's eyes.
Orange: Juicy oranges
Saffron: Saffron, Jai maharashtra !!!
Purple: Royality.
Voilet: Fair skinned beauty.
Silver: Mirrors.
Gold: Necklaces.

Anyone is tagged.

Beggar industry.

The beggar phenomena.......You see beggars on alll major signals of mumbai. I feel that this beggar community must be having some sort of organized setup. I mean, just look at the lot. They have a sort of, world of their own. Each one is involved in a different 'profession' within their own group.
You'll see some of them, genuine, really handicapped, having lost a leg or an arm. Well, those are the honest working class beggars.
Some of them will pretend to have injured a leg. They'll walk with a limp, or push a small 'skateboard' like cart with rag covered hands. You'll pity the beggar, give him some money and will see him get up and walk off once he gets it !!!! So that's acting and marketing strategy all bundled up in a package.
Rag carrying beggars are more 'sophisticated' in nature. They will give you 'service'. The rag wipes your car clean...... or so it would seem to the rag carrying beggar (Car here means a part of your car 'bonnet') You will be troubled, of course. Because the rag is never clean.....and it just leaves greasy stains on your car bonnet. But yeah, they put up their hands and ask for money anyway. That is how their service industry works. Just like the other car service industries, which only clean your car, when you give it for servicing, the beggar service industry just dirties your car bonnet when they provide service.
Expediating beggars are rampant near bus stops. They chase you down till you give the money to chase them away !!! There goes expediating and the procurement industry of beggars.
Cultural Industry of beggars booms in trains. They will carry an instrument like a harmonium or something and will sing hindi songs like 'pardesi pardesi jaana nahi' in loud shrill voices which irritate your ass off and you give them the money and say 'Yeh le aur pardes jaaa be, dimag khaana band kar'.
There are many other such professional beggars. Begging for more growth rates, more income, more job satisfaction and in general begging for more.

Think less....dont crave for a pensieve !!

The idle mind is a devil's workshop......maybe. But a filled mind is like a nuclear bomb...waiting to go off the moment a fuse is lived. Sometimes I feel that humans need a source of 'thought-let-out' like the 'pensieve' in harry potter books. In case, any of you people havent read harry potter books.....a pensieve is a kind of basin where you can store your thoughts, memories and peruse them later on. Now, I wish it was for real. People might've used it. I wouldnt have, though. I never think and hence thoughts never come. In fact, I doubt whether I have a brain or not !! Jokes apart, a human mind is filled with so many thoughts ,that it is rarely easy to get rid of all thoughts. Another reason why I think, I dont have brains....I CAN get rid of things very easily. If thoughts go on piling up in your mind, it gets saturated, just like steam does (You heard of saturated steam? Well, I heard it today, I was doing some engineering calculations.........that was a bad joke....it really was.....I havent been that worse in years !!) So, coming to the point, I feel that, if you think too much, its bound to happen, the thoughts are bound to start troubling you. Just like everything else in our body, except the heart, our mind needs rest. But it never does, does it?. That is why we relate the heart and the mind. They say in hindi....ya to dil ki suno.....ya to dimag ki (Either listen to the heart or to the mind). Why this competition? Its probably because both of them work continuously, never resting, never stopping. But just like we can make the heart strong, by eating less oily, and nutrient rich food, we can make our mind stronger and less vulnerable to attacks by......thinking less. Give thinking a rest, all the activities in your normal day need not be thought consuming. In your free time play games which are less analytical, watch movies which dont need much thinking, eat something delicious everyday !! And at the end of the day.....write some useless posts and blogs like these which dont require any thinking !!! And you'll never feel the need of a pensieve, to store your thoughts which have filled your mind to the brim !!!

Folks at home.

The pictures of the ideal people I drew in my mind, werent consistent with any greats in this world. Then one day I realised, that what I drew in mind bore resemblance to my folks at home.

How I got my first motorbike.

(The only significant thing in this post today, is, whats written in the title. Most of you would think, its a totally mismatched title for this post.) Today I met some of my engineering college friends. It was great fun. We discussed everything from people, cars, jobs, home loans etc. It kind of reminded me of my engineering college days (Just like everybody. People are reminded of 'those days' when they meet old friends !!). For me engineering college life was torrid. Most people would enjoy the college days. They are most memorable. Of course, I wouldnt say that, I didnt enjoy my college days. Its more like, I never had 'memorable' time. I dont think I would ever remember them as a happy memory. It was a point in my life, when I felt things couldnt be worse and believe me, i was right. I was suffering disappointments on all fronts. I was the worst student in class, I had a lot of KTs, all at different times. I was never used to seeing a 'pass' on the notice board where the results were put up plus I had a lot of run ins with teachers all throughout my engineering life. I once told a teacher in a viva that a question she asked was not from the syllabus. I was right about the syllabus, but no one is stupid enough to tell an external examiner that she is asking an invalid question, that too 'on her face'. Also, I was known to be an 'editor' .....A person who could make a 12 page assignment into a 6 page one, by the method of insystematic editing. Anyone, who was low on time to meet the assignment deadline would have my assignment to copy from. This was something which made me proud, people recognized me for something, atleast. If not a first class in studies at least I had a dubious distinction !!! As we approached our final year of engineering, I was buoyed up by one factor. Our college days were coming to an end. I hadnt performed well in my studies and I would certainly get a relief once education was over. The future looked bleak, but atleast the worst was coming to an end. My dad was worried about my future. He wasnt pressurizing me, but it was evident that he did not like the way things were going. With last year started the campus placements. Given my marks, I did not get any placements. In fact I didnt meet the cutoff marks criteria for most of the companies. My dad gave it a last shot, and told me that if I got a first class in my final year exams, he would buy me a motorbike. There are somethings in life which you never get. I thought that dad buying me a motorbike would be one of them !! Indeed, when I got my final year first term results (a 56% passing), I thought that I would never get a first class. That was because it wasnt possible for me to score a 64% in the final term to round the final year marks to a 60%, which is a first class. After that, I simply gave up hope. I studied like I wanted to, I went out to play when I wanted to and basically went all out on this 'I-dont-give-a-damn' attitude. In the last term exams, somehow, I managed to write my papers pretty well, gave my vivas without any incidents and enjoyed the final year farewell party, happily rejoicing, for those days would never come again while people cried for those days would never come again. I wasnt in anticipation of final term results. I knew they would be bad, even though, by my standards, the papers had gone off pretty well. In fact, I would be glad if I had passed all subjects. One day, one of my best friends, abhilash, called me and told me the results were out. I asked him, whether he saw them (he used to live near the college and usually was the first one to check the results.) He told me, yes. My folks were there with me watching while I talked to him. They looked more tense than I did and the anticipation on their part was intense. I coolly asked him about my results. He told me, I had got a first class in final year !!! I was so shocked to hear this that I didnt speak for a moment. Then when A said hello again, I came to and asked him how the others had fared. Later on I came to know that I had managed to get a 9 grace marks for a first class. Call it whatever you want, but I would call it, god given great luck !! I got my motorbike from dad, after all.

The balance of expression.

The fact of life: Everyone starts taking you for granted if you're too soft, you do all the work, you listen to all the orders and you take all the efforts.
Ethically, it is right to do all these things. There is just one thing to bear in mind. If you overdo this goody goody stuff, it'll backfire. And much as you would think of speaking and behaving nicely to people, sometimes you are compelled to raise your voice, argue, fire and squash people beneath your feet. This would be quite unlike me of course !!! (I ain't joking, I cant do all these as easily as some people would, it requires a lot of effort, in my case). But quite a lot of times these days, I find that its very useful. It shuts up people, they have to think twice before taking you for a ride with their bossy attitude and you learn how to defend yourself against dictatorship. It also gives you that very upmanship at times and the savage satisfaction of having defeated someone, or having shown him, that you can fight and overthrow your opponent. It makes you feel like a raging tiger or the king of the jungle. It gives you a psychological high. Can't overdo this stuff also, however. You keep speaking like that all the time and your words lose their value. People take you for a fool whose always arguing. Slowly people learn to ignore you even when your point may be right, although, raised your voice is, as always.
As they say, there needs to be balance of everything in life and human behaviour.

Sex kara aani slim raha

Well actually, it started of with someone sending an email; you know, one of those regular forward stuff. Now, I believe that there are a very few people who would actually 'read' a very descriptive sort of email in office, atleast, apart from that involving office work. For example, no one likes to read a long love story and no one wants too much information on how xyz achieved his goals inspite of being a pauper earlier. The main reason: People dont have time. An ideal 'office fwd email' would be one which contains pictures, or some good jokes or good cartoon strips etc. Pictures can be scanned through quickly, good jokes can refresh a worn-out mind and good cartoon strips do the same. Rarely is a descriptive type of email interesting.
Coming to the point, I once received an email, which was descriptive. It was good, I read it and I am sure it must have been read by all. The reason for this irony was that it was related to one of the most hottest topics in this whole world.......sex.
The subject line was: Sex kara aani slim raha (this was in marathi, the english translation would be, "Have sex and stay slim"). Now apparently, it was marked to quite a few people, mainly we people who are young and bachelors. Apart from this it was also marked to some seniors in office due the fact that they are the 'cool' sort of people whom other people dont mind sending such emails !!! Now there was this one senior SSS, who must be around 36-38 yrs of age. The mail was forwarded to him. I had read the mail and found it amusing. I smiled and moved on to my work. After some time, our department head came to pick up some of his printouts from the common printer which is kept on a table just a few places away where I sit. Now, the HOD has a habit of cleaning out the mess from the printer out tray (He hates it when people just keep their printouts lying on the tray.) So as usual he was checking all the stuff, and telling people off for leaving their printouts lying around. Suddenly he stopped and pulled out a paper from the bunch of papers he was holding in his hand. I saw the flash of a grin pass on his face. He handed me a printout. I thought that maybe I had forgotten about collecting it from the printer. I was about to say sorry when he laughed and said, "Its not yours, hand it over to SSS when he comes back to his place, and tell him that I picked it up from the tray" (SSS sits just a place ahead of me and had probably gone to the loo at that time !!).
I looked at the printout and realised that SSS had given a printout of the email subject lined 'sex kara aani slim raha' !!!! (The name of the person who gives the printout appears on the top of the email !!!). I laughed a lot secretly but somehow managed to keep a perfectly straight face when I handed him over the printout and told him that the HOD picked it up from the tray !! As he turned away to face his PC, I saw his ears turn red....

The love song and the hate song.

The following poem is for two people of opposite sex who have just fallen in love with each other:

Smile, her smile so bright,
She lit up my heart like a thousand lights.

She isnt so beautiful, she isnt so fair,
For me she's the one
who's so rare.

I'll fight for her, I'd die for her
I'd give my everything away..
I'd be with her, I'll care for her,
I'd think about her night and day !

Her hair so long,
A voice like a song,
Eyes like a dear,
Baby, come here, come here
Be my love, be my love !!

The following poem is for two people of opposite sex who have just started hating each other:

She looks at me like a hawk,
I wish I could give, give her a sock.

She isnt so beautiful, nor is she fair,
Yet I dunno how I liked this horrible mare.

I'd fight with her, I'd die for sure,
I'll lose my sanity and peace,
I cannot live with her, I have no cure,
Will I live, or will i cease?

She looks like a witch,
The stupid bitch,
My long lost love,
my long lost love !!

**************************Disclaimer*****************************************
This post does not bear any resemblance / relation with any two persons living or dead (natural causes or due to each other) It is completely in good humour and shall not be taken seriously. This disclaimer serves a notice that the poem is bound to be nasty to some extra sensitive types !!
****************************************************************************

Photography.

Now, i wouldnt say that the first word that left my mouth when I was born was 'camera', so don't think that I am the best photographer in the world or anything, I would'nt think so too. But then snaps clicked by me arent that bad either. For one thing, I hate it when people show me photographs which have only people in it !!! I mean if its a social event or a party function then you'd obviously have snaps of people taken, cause there is nothing else to shoot, but people !!! What I mean to say is that I like to take and view photographs of landscapes and natural beauty more than I like to take and view photographs of only people in them. Of course, one might argue that natural beauty is as is taken by the eyes of the beholder. For example, there might be a very naturally beautiful lady in the group of people whom you have snapped !! Yes, thats ok, but then, I have seen pictures of only people even when they go to places like kathmandu and nainital. I mean c'mon...... Whats the point of looking at stupid idiots when there are lush green, mountainsque and picturesque landscapes behind those dimwits? If you take a photo of someone standing with a clearly visible view behind him / her, it looks beautiful, in fact it adds beauty. But its simply ridiculous, if you're taking such a closeup that you're hiding the background from view !!!! Some fools argue that those are for memories. But my counter-agrument is that, good group photographs can still serve as good memories and a few group / couple photographs ought to be enough for the whole trip. The 'exotic poses' can be taken at home or matrimonial photos can be snapped in studios !! Some people are just out to prove that 'we-were-there-for-the-trip-and-we-enjoyed-a-lot !!' through the photographs !!! I mean, look, you dont have to prove that do you? Unless, you have an appointment with the district attorney who's out to prove that you are innocent in the murder case of some poor dodo who stayed in the same hotel as you did on the trip?

Think of the weekend.

I'll tag my readers to take this......Ten things which you think of when the 'real' weekend approaches...
My ten things.....
1) Sleepzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
2) Long gaming hours on the PC.
3) No work..laze around.
4) Cool glass of pineapple juice
5) Afternoon nap (Didnt include this in pt no. 1 coz.....its a totally different category of sleepzzz....the pleasure is more !!!)
6) Hang out with friends.....play pool, bowling, cricket, football.
7) Hang out with friends.....go for a long night time drive......have laughter filled and soulful chats....
8) Come home to a hot steaming.....mom-made dinner.....rice, curry, a nice aloo gobi....or mutter paneer ..or eat out with family or friends.....
9) Chat some more with folks......Write a post on da blog.......play some more PC games.....
10) Watch a night movie...

Route of the roses and route of the thorns !

Today I felt like running away from the office. The weather outside didnt help. It was nice cloudy, a bit breezy and it looked like it might rain. Thats the time when I remembered the 'life-is-a-road-with-many-forks' philosophy. There are times when you feel like running away from the difficulties. But you realise you have nowhere to go. They say you have to stay and fight. One road down the fork is very tempting. Its a bed of roses, comfortable, weather is fine and you feel like going down the garden on that route and just flopping down on the soft grass. The other road is the opposite kind. Uninviting, spectacularly barren, not even any dried berries to eat and thorns that would prick your bums if decide to flop onto them !!! Weather gets real rough at times. You'll be caught in storms, that you can fight, only if you stay alive and sane.
What would you choose? In my current 'professional conditions' I'd take the route of the roses !!!

The day of defeat.

There are times when you feel mentally DEFEATED at the end of the day. You have tried your best to make it good. Tried to please everyone, tried telling people nicely. Tried like hell to give the most sensible pieces of advice. Yet all the people who've been around you have either misunderstood you, have spoken ill of you, treated you like an enemy, spoken nastily about things which they dont know or are not concerned with and compared you to the most horrible people you have ever known, or with whom you wouldnt like to be compared with !!
Just for information....I didnt feel any of the above today.

The 9-point quiz on road rage.!!!

Do you do the following?
1) Does your heartbeat and pulse go up the moment you drive your car round the corner?
2) Do you wish at times that you had a monster truck or a road roller or better yet, a demolition ball?
3) Do you play GTA san andreas and idolize the character who mercilessly drives over pedestrians?Do you wish you could do that in real?
4) Does your middle finger go up in a salute to someone rather too quickly when driving a car?
5) Do you hurl the choicest abuses in front of your parents, colleagues, friends or complete strangers when you're driving, to a complete ass walking in the middle of the road?
6) Do you feel sadistic pride in having overtaken some car, and having squeezed it for space?
7) Do you feel a jumping joy in ur heart when an autorickshaw driver is hauled over by the traffic policeman?
8) Do you care less for your bike side mirrors, as long as it hits someone hard enough to teach him a lesson in non-hasty and careful ways of crossing the roads?
9) Do you fail to feel amazed by the fact that your car doesnt even have a scratch, let alone a dent or a blemish, even though you drive your car alongside the craziest and the nuttiest drivers?

If your answer to any of the above questions is a yes......congratulations and welcome to the world of road rage. Everything is fair in love, war and mumbai streets !!!

Waiting for the monsoons.

The end of summer,
The end of pains,
The end of the humidity,
And the start of the rains.

Oh the monsoons,
the monsoons are arriving,
the sky is greying,
and the wind is whistling.

Hailstorms and flooding,
thunder and lightning,
Shadows and sunshine,
Oh ! The landscape so fine !!

Umbrellas and raincoats,
Gum boots and paper boats,
Alike, the kids and folks
Can't wait to get soaked !!

Come one come all,
Enjoy the rains,
till cometh the fall.

Thats all of how I can express my feelings. The heat and humidity these days is at its peak. And mumbaikars are waiting for the monsoons to get underway. When it does start finally, it'll be raining all day everyday. And like everything in mumbai which changes fast, so will the opinion of people. They'll be saying "When will the rains end?"

Lack of enthu.

For starters let me tell you this....I am in quite a strong, hateful and edgy mood today. I cant say that I didnt laugh today at all. But this was a day when I laughed with devilish satisfaction. More of the sneery, smirky, smug, sadistic type of laughter. As I was telling ron, one of my best friends, I hate when people dont show enthusiasm. Enthusiasm of any kind at all.
Its not that I deny that some people dont have many activities, hobbies or interests. But then its impossible for anyone to have no topic of interest at all. You might say that they have interests other than your own. Possible. But some people, just go in a trance like state and seem to be staring at some sort of void in the air, when you are speaking. After sometime you start feeling whether you yourself are talking in an alien tongue or whether you are a brainless git.
The reality dawns upon you later on and you realise that the person with whom you are speaking with, lacks enthusiasm in any topic you come up with and he is the one who's a brainless git.

Winning

I played and I lost,
But never a regret there was.
Coz somewhere in my heart,
I knew that I had taken part.

But tommorow's another day,
I know I'll find a way,
I'll reach for the far,
And beat the stars,
And shine like the sun,
And feel like the one.


As kids we were told that participation in any competition was important rather than brooding over the results.
I dont think so.....I beg to differ now. Winning is important. How to win is something which has to be learnt. And that comes when you actually participate in the competition and lose. You lose and you learn. What you learn helps you to win. It helps to brood over what went wrong. It doesnt help to just participate. Nobody gives a shit if you participate. You have to participate to build your own experiences.
(What have I written? Does it even make sense?)

The not so green thumb.

So I saw this kid watering the young saplings which are planted in our building compound. He was being advised on how to water them by his grandpa ("Lower the hose, son....dont spray a jet near the base, you'll damage the roots"). The kid, for fun, or because he was annoyed with his grandpas constant lecturing.......sprayed some water on grandpa's shirt. I was passing by and smiled.....smirked, rather. This was the same old fellow who had stopped us from playing cricket in the building premises when we were young !!! Anyone troubling him makes me happy and I feel a natural bond to the person who troubles him !!! I mentally made notes to give the young kiddo a huge bar of chocolate later on !!!

Seeing the kid water the plant I remembered an incident. When I was in the 3rd grade, one of our teacher had asked us to plant a small sapling in a small pot at home (Instructions were pretty much basic. We werent told what to plant, that was for ourselves to find out. The pot was to be a small cup....An ice cream cup would do.). We were asked to record the growth in its length every day and its overall progress. The small plant was to be bought to school and shown to the teacher. Marks were supposed to be given on how healthy the plant appeared and how much the growth was. I was very excited, initially, and was looking forward to planting. However school time enthusiasm was forgotten once I got home. In fact, I forgot all about it until the very last day of the 'dead line' of 'submission of the sapling', which was some 15-20 days from the date on which the teacher had given us the project. Now, its agreed that you can't grow a 'tree' in 15-20 days, but I know (now, of course) that mustard seeds if planted in soil can grow quickly. However knowledge was of no consequence !!! The reality was that I had totally forgotten about it. Even if I did know it then, what was the use, if it had slipped completely off my mind? The teacher reminded us once a week, but even then I forgot. Then one day the teacher said, "Children, bring your plant tommorow, I hope they are growing well and you are watering them regularly."
It was then that I remembered !!! Oh yes, the plant ! I havent planted them !!! Oh what will I do?. And while everyone was happily discussing how well their plant had grown, I was left pondering on how to achieve a miracle. Usually mom was more 'demonic' and less 'angelic' when such kind of careless situations turned up....(I am sure every mom is.) and I wasnt exactly willing to tell mom to perform some kind of miracle.
I had an idea, of course. Next day (On day of submission.) I went downstairs and brought some 'soil' from the very place the kid was watering the plant today !!!
I remember scooping a handful of 'soil' in an old ice cream cup. So, I said to myself, "There's the soil". Now comes the plant. So I simply uprooted a weed-like thing from the ground, kept it in the soil collected in the cup and just packed some soil around its base. I put some water on the soil....and sprinkled some on the plant....it had to look fresh. It looked like a plant to me.......all fed and watered !!! The soil looked a bit more light coloured to me.....maybe it was because it did not have enough water, so I put some more. I punctured 5 holes at the base of the cup so that the extra water would drain off. And there it was....a nice plant. Grown by a cheat. I was proud of myself, even somewhat confident that I'll get good marks off it !!! I took the plant to school and showed it to the teacher. The teacher took one look at the plant and understood, of course. She simply pulled it out easily (of course.....if its not actually planted it comes off easily, isnt it?). She simply asked me, "What is this nonsense? Didnt I ask you ages ago to plant something? You havent done it and dare to bring this .....this 'fixed' plant to me? you'll get a big zero!! Get out of the class and kneel outside." So there I was, kneeling down outside the classroom, caught cheating and then 'humiliated' in front of my classmates !! Later on, I learnt that even the 'soil' I used was not soil,actually, but rather the loose gravel, used by the construction workers, who were repairing the building columns, at that time !!! Whenever, I think of this incident, I laugh. One things for sure, though. I never did have a green thumb anytime in my life, not then and not even now !!!!

Shape of the clouds and the dark sieve !!

Its been a very hot summer and hence cool beers or cool breezes are a pleasure. Since I dont prefer beer, I suggested that we ride down our bikes to the nearby 'hilly place' to enjoy the latter. Two of my office colleagues + friends were game. So we set off after office, SSR sitting pillion with me and RAA riding single. The ghat to the hilltop is always an enjoyable drive or ride, depending on whether you are in a car or on a bike. We reached the hilltop, parked our bikes and started the small trek to the peak. And we were glad that the cool breeze, we had come for was indeed there !! We reached the peak. While the other two of my friends were enjoying the scenery,
I took off my T-shirt, kept my bag on the ground and using it as a pillow, lay down on the earth. I closed my eyes for a moment and opened them again, and saw the vastness of the sky above. The soft cotton balls (the metaphor is commonly used) were far off, moving at a swift pace. I tried to imagine their shapes like I used to do when I was younger. But I couldnt make anything out of them. Nor was it a rabbit, nor an elephant, nor an old man, nor a house. Didnt think much of that then. What's there in a cloud anyway? They come, they go......they bring rains at times...Whats the big deal if it doesnt seem to be shaped like a monkey? When I sat up I saw a truly wonderful sight of the sunrays being filtered through gaps in some of the dark clouds. I was mesmerized by that lovely light amidst the dark sieve of the clouds and so were my friends.
Now, I dont know whether I am stupid to say this or anything, but later on for a moment, I actually regretted not seeing the clouds shaped like something. Am I losing my creativity or imagination, which was stronger when I was young? It was fun back then, seeing the cloud form some shape, letting your imagination run......is it not fun anymore? Has practical life taken away all my imagination, aspirations, dreams?
I saw the sunrays being filtered.....and thought of how wonderful the sun was........and then I completely missed the thought of why those sunrays got their identity and the focusing effect......it was due to the sieve like dark clouds !!!
Sometimes we are so overawed by the bigger picture that we totally miss the finer points which makes the bigger picture so much worth its value !!!

Lectures = meetings / presentations

Its one of those things that you remember out of the blue someday. It used to be mom who used to teach me marathi subject. My mom is one of the best teachers of the subject. That's what I used to hear from her tution students. Thats because I used to close my eyes while pretending to hear mom explain. I used to tell mom that I am listening to her and just that I can concentrate better if I close my eyes. After I closed my eyes, I would, of course, fall asleep. Mom isnt stupid and she used to make me get up, sit upright and ask me questions. Mom has a golden heart too.....and was at times content to see me sleep!! She let me sleep for about half an hour and then used to wake me up and start explaining chapters. Although I did sleep during the explanation time, it wasnt because mom was a bad teacher or boring or anything. It was just that I would feel sleepy after my lunch.

I remembered because, even today, if there is an important meeting going on, with a dead serious topic of discussion....I cant help but feel sleepy, restless and bored. No matter how interesting the presentation, how good the presenter, however good the length of the presentation / meeting may be.

Blogging woes.

A friend of mine has a blog. He recently wrote a post on his blog. I read it and told him so this evening. "Yes, That one....ya....wrote it last evening. Although it didnt turn out quite the way I wanted it to."
Ya. It does happen..... lots of times doesnt it?

You want to write something......but you cant think of a topic.
You dont want to write something but you are feeling trapped and lonely and want to release some frustration and express it in some form of the other and feel that your blog is the best way to vent it out.
You had a fixed topic in mind to write about, but when you started writing....you drifted away from the issue....
You didnt have a fixed topic but whatever you wrote came out well.
You remember some incident, feel like writing about it.......but somehow after writing it down...it doesnt seem to be like the same incident !!!
You start writing about a serious topic and when it is written down....it sounds rubbish !!
Sometimes you are just tired and cant write..although you want to...

Lots of other factors that way or the other. I henceforth cristen them as the 'Blogging woes'.
Wonder how professional writers handle these kind of woeful mood swings?

Those who pray and those who care,
Please say that he is still there.

He created Adam,
He created Eve,
He created their love and he created the seed.

He was generous and he was kind,
He was gracious and he didnt mind.
Those who pray and those who care,
Please say that he is still there.

Man became selfish and he became blind,
He created a kingdom ruled by might.
He wanted power, he wanted fame,
He wanted to be known and killed for gain.

He progressed and so he thought,
And so the precious territories for which he fought
After the war came the peace,
And then came again, a bloodfeast.

And so it went on and on,
And in the end became a norm.
This is the story of mankind....and so it will continue till the end of days,
Till he changes his self destructive ways.

And so I say, to those who pray and those who care,
Please hope that God is still there.

-By
Me. (Hoping that God is still everywhere on earth as per popular belief. Contrary to popular belief, I believe God left this place a long time ago, seeing man being such an arrogant bastard that he is today !!!)

Jawhar-Sajan-Kelwa: Part 2

So after taking the right left turn for Palghar, we finally felt relieved. We still werent sure that we would have a place to stay the night of course. But at least we had found the correct route and even that was something !! In fact it was something of an achievement after a botched up journey. And then surprise surprise, we found quite a nice place to stay called 'Kelwa beach resort'. This resort had cottages as well as some dorms. We rented a cottage for a 1000 smackers each (There were 3 of us) . The room rent included our dinner and breakfast. It had a small gate which opened out to the Kelwa beach. We dumped our bags in our rented cottage and headed straight for the beach. We stripped to our water gear..... Irfan wore his swimming trunks, rohan .... his boxers and me in shorts. We tore towards the water like young kids towards an ice cream man. The touch of sea water was so soothing after a whole day of travelling. We spent a quite a lot of time in the water. It was so cool and so refreshing that I didnt feel like leaving at all. Back at the hotel all of us had showers and then sat down outside. (The cottage had a small sit-out). As always, we had a lot of fun chatting. Long soulful chat, where we discussed life, people, cricket, IPL, relationships etc. After this was time for dinner. There was a buffet dinner. There was kofte ki sabji, dal, rice, rotis and ravas fish fry and custard for dessert. I liked the ravas fry, especially. After this we came back and slept like logs till 8 in the morning. I was the first one to get up. I ordered tea so that the other two would get up and I wouldnt get bored sitting there alone !! After tea we went to the beach again to take some photos and shoot some videos. It was low tide and the waters had drawn back so much that we had to walk for atleast 5 minutes to get to it !!! Kelwa beach.....I observed, is not as clean as, maybe, say, Kashid. But its still good enough to have a fun time ! We had breakfast and left the place at around 11:30 A.M. As we had not included lunch in our package the manager of the resort tried to tell us that we had to check out at 10:00 A.M (It was actually because some other people had booked the room for the day and were checking in early.). But since we had no such prior information from him about the check out time, we had a little argument with him. Rohan raised his voice a bit (or maybe his voice is a bit strong !!). Anyway, the manager was a bit intimidated and he 'adjusted' our check out time to 11:30 A.M !! We played some table tennis and left the place at around 11:15 A.M. We took turns to drive the car. Return journey was via Mumbai - Ahmedabad road. I wouldnt say it was the best of our trips. But I would say that it was one of the most adventurous and fun trips I'd ever had !

Jawhar-Sajan-Kelwa trip: Part 1

So finally I had my trip. It was all thanks to irfan once again, who once again managed to get hold of his car, so that we could make a quick journey. One day before the trip, I went to two or three travel agents to ask their rent-a-car rates. I was discouraged by the exorbitantly high rates (We were going to make a 2 day trip and we hadnt booked a place to live. We were just going to go to some undecided place and book a resort on the spot. So there was no point in booking a car just like that.) It was finally Irfan's call in the evening that shook me from my deadened and discouraged state. He told me that he had his dad's car at his disposal for two days and that we could finally go to someplace. It was decided in the evening that we (three of us...Rohan, Irfan and me) go to Jawhar, a hill station in Thane district, a little off the Mumbai-Ahmedabad road. Next day we started at around 0945 hrs (after casting our votes for the Lok sabha candidates.).
We took the Bhiwandi route (like idiots). This is because we did not know how to go from the Mumbai - Ahmedabad route. So we took the route to bhiwandi via Shilphata and then mumbra. We went through what seemed to be like the most interior part of bhiwandi....before we finally came out and started cruising towards Shelar and then Waada. On the way we stopped in Waada for some wadas !!! The road was nice and curvy after that and Irfan was having a time of his life driving his Hyundai accent. Before Jawhar, there was a ghat. On reaching Jawhar....we started at once to look for places to stay. Jawhar is a hillstation and is quite good for its view and all. But we realised some time later that it hasnt got any places to stay in and not much to see at summertime and that we should come down here in the monsoons !!! We were disappointed. We even searched for places to eat, but there was hardly any decent place to eat, let alone to stay in !!! We decided to head to Sajan which is just some Kms away from Jawhar. We had read about Sajan having a nice nature trail resort. On reaching the resort, we found that it was fully booked and once again it was not a hotel, meaning that there was no food. Again it was disappointment for us. It was 2:00 pm, our stomachs were rumbling with hunger and we had not even found a place to stay. We decided now, to head to Palghar, which is a coastal town, and has the famous Kelwa beach. We were hoping that we get a good place to stay in Kelwa !! Thinking that we should probably eat the first place we see now, we stopped at a dhaba which was fairly decent looking. We had a filling lunch and started off again. Just minutes later, we reached the highway, and wondered how bad our luck had been. Minutes earlier we had stopped at a Dhaba thinking that there would be no better place to eat on the path ahead and now just a few miles down, the road connects to the highway, where there are plenty of hotels to eat !! In the way we kept asking Irfan whether he wanted to take a break from driving his car. But he was enjoying the drive and had no desire to break off his rhythm. We took a right turn and headed towards the Palghar turn / cutting and kept driving. After going on for almost 25 Kms and passing a toll booth, we realised that we had left the Palghar turn behind. We took a U-turn, paid the toll again and headed back again.
Now it is said that man learns from his mistakes. But apparently we did not, that is because after driving back 25 Kms we drove another 10 Kms in the opposite direction and still hadnt found the Palghar turn !!! We stopped to ask someone. We found a scrawny looking man and asked him "Where is the Palghar turn?".
"Where do you want to go?" he asked.
"Palghar" we said.
"Then why did you come here?" he asked.
(That was a STUPID question.
Because we knew that the Palghar turn was behind and came ahead just to see your face and ask you directions of some turn already knew, BOZO !!...thats what we thought )
Anyway, he gave us the right direction. We were about to take a U-turn. When the U-turn was about to be taken, Irfan asked us whether we want to go to Palghar or head back to Mumbai? (Till this time we had travelled a lot, were hungry again and had been to the wrong places, taken the wrong routes and we were finding a place, where we were not sure whether we would even find a place to stay, so the thoughtful question from Irfan !!) After some contemplation, rohan and me were all for finding Palghar. So we took the U-turn and finally after going to and fro on the same highway for around 50 Kms we found the correct turning for Palghar. Hurrah !!!
Later on Irfan commented that
Life is just like the journey we had that day......we come to right place after going through so many wrong turns, so many treacherous climbs and descends. So many people, give you directions, few of them are right and many others, wrong. Also there are times when you decide, whether to head back to the safety of your homes or go on bravely in hunt of unaccomplished challenges, inspite of all the disappointments on the way !!!
(To be con'td)

Oath of a trip enthusiast.

These days I am quite skeptical of planning out a trip with my friends (friends here mean the group of my 5-6 closest friends) . The reason being that whenever a plan is made its almost always cancelled. There is a popular saying that rules are meant to be broken. In my friends' group case 'Trip plans are made to be cancelled'. No doubt that we have been to some of the most unforgettable trips and tours. But then even those plans were always made by a single person (my friend Irfan, bless him, God !!) Rest all of the people are experts at ruining plans, citing 'genuine' reasons like......
1) I have no money. The trip is out of my budget.
2) I have some work. (Right ! We have none.)
3) My parents wont allow me to go. (Why? Are we cannibals?)
4) The season is not right.
Personally, I am not a plan ruiner and take an enthusiastic part in planning a picnic. But when others are not enthusiastic, I lose my cool. I am never one to make up one of the above excuses.
1) No money.....Ya right....its going to cost a fortune and nobody's going to loan you any! Its not like we dont have money at all. All of us are working individuals now. Even if we dont earn very much we arent beggars !! . And when an excellent opportunity for a holiday comes your way, you should grab it no matter what !!
2) Work.......Right we have none !!! Work work and work, you have to, all your bloody life. Holidays are planned to get a break from this very work. Its ok to keep it aside for some time and go out with your friends, when you all have a good long weekend.
3) Wont be allowed: Why? Are we cannibals? Are we going to eat you? This was a favourite excuse when we were younger. Now its not. But plans are still cancelled. So who'll bother giving this reason? (Please note that I am referring here to an all boys group !!)
4) If the season is not right, you have to plan going to some place where it is right.

There have been so many times that we have got stuck up because we have no transportation. But then we always had options of hiring vehicles.
There has been so much of trip cancellation now, I have already sort of joined a trekking group through an office colleague of mine. They go on treks regularly. I am also seriously thinking of going somewhere myself with tour companies. No kidding ......these are the only ways that I am going to enjoy seeing places.

My best friends wedding (Part 2) : The party !!!

There are fun times which you never forget all your life. KCs wedding reception party was one such occasion. It had everything......meeting old friends....music......dancing......food.....drinks. It was more of a 'party' than a 'reception'. You can say we saw a mix of traditional and modern ways of celebrations on the same day.
We arrived early.....the party had not started then. We had bought KC and his wife gifts....which we had selected after great deal of contemplations, discussions, brain storming and brain stomping!!. Buying a gift had never been so difficult for us......thats cause we never gave gifts to anyone in our group for birthdays or anything else !!! But since this was KCs marriage we wanted to pick out the perfect gift for him and his wifey. Bhabhiji had suggested diamonds.....she was either joking or being seriously stupid......as diamonds were way beyond our 'reach'. I will always remember the way....me and rohan and others discussed the different kinds of gifts for him. I remember that I had asked some of my friends and colleagues for gift ideas....
In the end we bought them nice wrist watches (and added a packet of _____ as an additional gift to KC.).
Anyway, on the night of the party, we were the first ones to arrive. People began to come in slowly after that.
KC and bulbul came in after some time. KC once again looking smart in a black blazer and bulbul beautiful again in a black coloured dress. The party started with the arrival of the couple. Drinks and starters were being served. People were being introduced to each other. An hour later the music started.....people started stepping rhythmically. Slowly the tempo picked up and the floor was now alive with enthusiastic dancers.
I dont ever remember dancing like that before with my friends. We all have been friends for so long now.....and yet the only time we danced together was probably when we won our locality cricket matches !!! KC and bulbul looked so happy......Indeed by the time the party was well into the night....all the people in the party were happy....some just happy and others alcoholically happy.
There were some truly unforgettable moments.....KC and bulbul waltzing..... KCs brother and KCs bhabhi doing a jive.........People hugging each other simply because they were happy (and drunk, of course !!!)......KCs brother pulling me onto the dance floor and asking me to dance......My friends all looking very joyous.......Jitu dancing so well......rohit dancing like he always does......
At the end of the day (night, I should say) of wedding KC thanked us for supporting him thru his thick and thins...we hugged each other. The first from our group to get married is KC. We all wish him and bulbul a very happy married life.

Sun le tu dil ki sada.

Sun le tu dil ki sada........Pyaar se pyaar sajaa...
Sun le tu dil ki sada .......Pyaar se pyaar sajaa....

Meri aawaz kaa teer....
jayega Dil ko bhi cheer...
Khoye nafrat...
Laye ulfat....
Ye aasar hai.....meherabaan...
Sun le tu dil ki sada..Pyaar se pyaar saja...

Pyaar rasta hai mera...
Aisa raahi hu tera....
Naa rahu main...
Naa rahe tu....
Par rahegi daastan...
Sun le tu dil ki sada..Pyaar se pyaar saja...

Do dilon ki yeh lagan...
Jaane dharti aur gagan....
Tu jahan hai...
main wahan hu...
Jism do hai....
Ek jaan....
Sun le tu dil ki sada..Pyaar se pyaar saja...

These are the lyrics of a wonderful song from the film Tere ghar ke saamne sung by Mohd Rafi, one of my favourite playback singers. Kyaa dard tha unki aawaz mein !!!

My best friend's wedding (Part 1) - The marriage

The day had finally arrived. 'KC weds Buls' was the invitation. I was still to come out of that state when you say.....Huh? Yesterday, I was a kid.....today my best friend is getting married.
My best friend's wedding took place on the 18th April 2009. I am writing this date in this post because I am bad at remembering birthdates and anniversaries. So its good to make a note of it. Next year I'll remember to wish my friend KC and my bhabhi-friend bulbul a happy anniversary. KC called me up in the morning and told me again to be there for the wedding. (As if I would'nt !!!). Me and irfan arrived at the temple hall exactly at 11:30 am as he told us. Rohan came up later. Slowly the hall filled with people. There were kids and older men who looked like KC so we came to the conclusion that they must be his cousins and uncles respectively (haha!!) . After some time of waiting I saw both of them climb the stairs and walking hand in hand. It was KC and bulbul.......KC looking very smart and handsome in that slim fit formal shirt, his face looking bright and happy (the facial helped also, i guess). Bulbul, looking gorgeous, in a lovely saree, carrying herself gracefully, with her hair tied up in an elegant knot. Both looked very happy. Before the 'vidhis' started, KC was made to wear the traditional 'pheta' or 'pagdi'. The pheta fitted him like a song. Never before having seen KC in that traditional pheta we found it quite funny and laughed. The 'vidhis' started after that. KC stood up for the vidhi and it was at that moment....when I saw him in the pheta standing beside the guruji for the 'mangal ashtak' vidhi......that I really came to terms with the fact that my friend was finally getting married !!! Until then everything seemed to be so unreal....just like a dream. It was just like , you know when things are going to happen, but still, you dont come to terms with it until they really happen !!! As I saw Kedar (KCs brother) playfully throwing 'akshatha' with unnecessary force.....this scene seemed to roll in slow motion in front of my eyes......and I was reminded of my younger days when I went to KCs place to play.....and he had these physical fights with Kedar...for the cricket bat. When I came back to the present the 'mangal ashtak' was over. Kedar told us to proceed for lunch. When I went downstairs, I realised that my footwear was missing. I had kept it at the entrance but it wasnt there anymore. Oh boy !! I thought !! Its KCs wedding and my footwear is bring stolen !! I had another 'vision' in which an older looking KC and bulbul were telling their kids...."Look children, here is your uncle, whose 'chapals' were stolen in our marriage" and all of them laughing !!!
I grinned to myself. "I am getting too many 'visions' "I said to myself and went to the nearby store to buy a new pair of flotters. We had lunch and left for home. There was going to be a reception party in the evening and I wanted to sleep in the afternoon so that I was energetic to dance in the party !!

English is a very funny language....some 'peoples' make it even funnier !!!

A certain Mr. XXX from my office (he is from another department) had arranged a picnic for his department people. Now, this department is 30 strong. 7 guys from his department confirmed that they would like to go for the picnic. Apart from the 7 nobody else was going. However later on even these 7 fellas dropped out citing personal reasons. . So Mr.XXX wrote a mail to everyone in his department......It goes this way....

"PICNIC CANCELLED, PICNIC CANCELLED
No Confirmation is received and the peoples who already confirmed now taken the deviation for picnic. No picnic will be arranged henceforth.
Regards,
XXX"

(Note the usage of the english language.....very funny......deviation is a very commonly used official term in our company.)

Now, it so happened that another fellow from that department fwded the mail to RV, a guy in our department. It so happens that, earlier Mr XXX had tried to arrange a cricket match in the same fashion with our department's cricket team.....and that had also been cancelled on account of the non-availability of his department's cricket team members...

RV wrote a mail to Mr. XXX saying.....
Sorry to interrupt, but if you can’t arrange for a simple picnic program…..why did you ask us to arrange for a cricket match……….?
No thanks or regards,
RV

Mr XXX saw the reply.....he wasnt at all happy that the mail (the one about the picnic being cancelled. ) which should have been circulated within his department only, was sent to RV who is from another department and who made fun of him. Mr. XXX thought that the mail was 'divulged' to RV by some lady who is in Mr. XXX dept.

Mr XXX then sent a 'scorcher'....to RV.....
"It seem that someone ( I don’t know who but I don’t want to insult a Who.. , she is atleast loyal with the one who pays her ) from my dept have stabbed my dept.
Do you feel that arranging a picnic with such peoples is a simple program? I don’t bother about such peoples also. But still it was managed and cancelled because two of my friends are not available for the picnic due to genuine reason. Anyway there is no personal with you. I don’t want to loose friends. Atleast like u. I don’t want to stretch this issue which may create a nuisance to us and all ,who are involved in this mail. I havenot copy this mail to anyone.
Requested to you ( atleast) Become a wise man.
I don’t want to start a day with such mail.
With Warm Regards
XXX"

Wow !!! I know I arent an expert in the english language.....but this is simply horrible grammar, vocab and spelling....I dont know how this fellow writes his official mails?

Little cousin sister's day in...

My little cousin sister had the day of her life yesterday. Summer holidays have started for schools and she had invited 6 of her friends home. The little girls had a gala time. Everyone's mom left them to my uncle and aunt's place at around 10 in the morning. They had a fantastic lunch of aloo parathas made by my aunt whos an expert cook. The first thing they did, after that, was to organize a small skit....'Cinderella'. They prepared and handed out small hand-written invitation cards on nice colourful papers to everyone in the house. Me, my dad (me and dad were there for a visit), my uncle, my aunt, my grandparents. My invitation card bore the following script:

Ravi Dada
You are invited to see the following play:
Name: Cinderela (That was the spelling)
Time: 3:00 P.M
Venue: Hall (This 'Hall' meant the living room of my uncle and aunt's place)

My cousin sister had 'directed' the play. She played the role of Cinderella. All of us sat on the living room sofas as 'audience'. They had a makeshift 'curtain', a bedsheet held on by two girls. The curtain was dropped (The girls quickly scrambled away pulling the bedsheet!!)

The skit was quite cute and was quite well made. They even had a sequence where the prince and cinderella danced in 'ball-room' style. 'Blue danube' was played on a mobile phone with speakers, while the prince and cinderella danced. There was some giggling in the middle of the play and some prompting too !!! And they forgot the last scene where the prince and cinderella hold hands and the fairy godmother showers flowers on them !!! The 'fairy Godmother' came out and giggled "Hey Cinderella, you forgot the flowers scene !!!" As my elder sister would say .....'Cho Chweet !!!'

It was then Ice cream time for the young ones....and giggling continued all the time. Then they went downstairs to play...and then one by one all their mothers came to pick them up. An enjoyable day for them.

I remember those days when my mom used to leave me at KCs place and then we used to play all day.....It was so special to visit a friends place. Still is.........but back then it was once in a bluemoon opportunity to visit a friend's place!!!

Good luck and bad luck.

Luck never takes sides. Everyone has equal distribution of luck. If I am out of luck today, its just that my time is bad. Tommorow, if the times are good, it does not mean that I am just plain lucky. Conclusion .....

Luck is fickle,
But Luck is fair,
Good luck, while it lasts,
Enjoy your share.

Uncle and uncle's bhabhijis

My sister giving me a niece. My best friend KC getting married. Another one, Dr NNA, with his engagement fixed in May. Suddenly, I feel very grown up. Things have changed pretty much pretty soon. My niece will call me 'mama'. Someone who'll call me 'uncle' is something I have to come to terms with. Anyway, mom told me the news on the phone. The baby was born on 7th April 2009...So that's her birthdate. She's an Arien. Curiously, its on the same date as my best friend's KC's birthdate, which is 7th June. The phone rang at 2030 hrs IST on 7th April. Mom told me "The good news has come."
My best friend whom I've known for the past 20 years will be marrying his lady love. And I will have someone whom I'll call 'bhabhi' (Bhabhi is actually brother's wife, but since friends are like brothers, their wife is also called as 'Bhabhi'. (I'll address her by her name of course....but still....she'll be a bhabhi). Congratulations to the lovely couple !!! I've been asking my friend, what gift he wants for his wedding. He says he doesnt his own house to keep gifts. So I told him that I cant afford to buy him a house, but he can ask for anything else !!! If he doesnt tell me, I'll ask bhabhiji and if she doesnt tell me either.....I'll give them a 'Food bazaar voucher' which I guess will be totally useless for them !!!
NNA has been out of contact for a long time. He makes his special appearances only during the ganeshotsav festival at my place. Still it was a pleasant shocker for me to hear that hes getting hitched....He's the kind of guy who would say...."Shaadi kidhar yaar, abhi? Abhi tak to mera MD karna baki hai." Congratulations to him too. Wasnt in contact with us for a long time. Now, he wont remember us at all !!! Meri aur ek bhabhiji.

Summer time.

I am writing this post because I am glad I am home and not outside. I had just been out in the open right now and the sun is blazing away all its atomic power and dazzling and roasting people on earth in mumbai. Thousands of things have been said on global warming and its effect, but frankly, I have never before experienced such a solid heat wave in mumbai. It was a recorded 40 degrees high in the shade, at colaba the day before yesterday. It seems like if you drop an egg on your head it will fry. A drop of water falling on the trunk of a car sizzles like 'tadka dal' (Smack !!! That makes me hungry !!!) Mumbai summer brings with it more pains than pleasures, just like the mumbai monsoons. The summer heat certainly has effect on people's brains too. For instance, everyone in office, yesterday, seemed to be blowing their tops more than usual. It was'nt unusual for my boss to blow his top. Thats coz' he does it everyday !!! But yeah, weather does have an effect on people. Heat makes you feel irritable and anger, just like sweat, surfaces more often than usual. Mumbai summer- The advantages: Mangoes and 'Kayris' sweet mangoes, when eaten transport you to seventh heaven, lip smacking and satisfying juicy and ripe.....and Kayris (raw mangoes).....put some salt and chilli powder on them and what you have is a delightful snack....my mouth starts watering thinking about kayri.
So apart from mangoes and kayris, I am waiting for summer to get over and rains to start.
The song goes......we're all going on a summer holiday......
I realised it a long time back that its for California, where the summers are fine.........not for mumbai where the heat is unbearable.

Then and now...

On the lines of the last post, i tag all readers of my blog to take this one....

The nickname mom gave me as a kid...?
Goondoba.

The nickname I have now...from mom, friends and colleagues?
Goondoba, muttz and RC respectively.

Any one thing I never understood as a kid?
How a computer works?

Any one thing which I dont understand now?
How does my home PC work despite all the viruses it contains.

Any one thing I loved doing as a kid?
Playing cricket.

Any one thing which I love doing now?
Playing counter-strike, cricket, writing blog etc.

Any one thing which I hated as a kid?
Studying.

Any one thing which I hate now?
Working.

Any one thing I heard dad say many times when I was a kid?
I dont understand your mom.

Any one thing I hear dad say often now?
I never really understood your mom !!!

Any one thing which you did not understand about women as a kid?
Why they dont have mustaches while men do.

Any one thing which you did not understand about women now?
I dont understand anything about women till now, except why they dont have mustaches.

Any one thing you dreamed of as a kid?
Of becoming a pilot.

Any one thing you dream of now?
Of being the king of this world.

Hence I reach the conclusion that more or less everything is the same as it was when I was a kid. Or to put it in a better way............I am still a kid at heart !!!!

Ur favourite timepass ???

Dear friend KC has tagged all the readers of his blog and since I am in a mood to write today but out of topics, I accept his tag.....so here goes....

Favourite time pass when u are alone ?? Listening to music at louder volumes, watching movies, eating, singing, dancing.....

Favourite time pass when u are wid friends ?? Playing counter-strike and other computer games, pulling friends' legs (not literally), bird watching and bird analysis, watching movies, eating, going out on drives, playing cricket, pool, bowling etc.

Favourite time pass when u are wid ur family ?? Going out on drives in car, playing scotland yard (detective board game), eating (again)

Favourite time pass when u are wid colleagues ?? If colleagues are friends.....then the above 'friends' part is applicable, if not, then, I dont know......maybe talk to them and see if we are like minded about my boss being a bastard that he is.

Favourite time pass when u are wid boss ?? To see him being screwed by the superboss !!!

Favourite time pass while travelling ?? Listening to music and see the scenery and the greenery outside.....

Mentor.

When it comes to professional life.......nobody can be depended upon, to lend you any 'support' or 'help'. You are on your own, a loner, singular. Whatever problems you have, you have to face them yourself. This belief makes life easier. However, before you reach this conclusion , there are some people whom you call as, your mentors. They would seem like 'born leaders' to you. You start 'hero worshipping' them. You cannot find any fault with them. They seem like the greatest and the coolest of people to work under. Everything seems to be so easy around them. They encourage you for the good work you've done, cover up your mistakes and fight it for you, when you are passing through difficult phases. Then, one fine day you realise that they aren't that calm and cool. They crack under pressure and when this happens, they behave strangely, so much so, that you start wondering whether this is the same person. You start wondering whether he was cool as a cucumber before, or just plain carefree and careless? Your earlier opinion takes a beating and you start questioning and revising your own beliefs on mentor-ism and 'born leadership' skills. Period.

Nirlajam sada sukhi

There is an old adage in marathi..... "Nirlajam sada sukhi". It means that people who are shameless (not in the 'physical sense of the meaning', of course..) are the happiest. If the reverse of this is true.....I am probably the most shameless person in this whole wide world !!!
Yes, its probably the fact that being shameless upto a great extent protects my sanity and my emotional balance !!!
At times I feel grateful that God's given me two ears. One for listening and other for letting out the filtered information !!!
As kids, we were often scolded by our school teachers....." Dont just stand their laughing shamelessly." or "That was a shameless lie, you idiot." etc. I remember that children who were shameless were happier, even that time. Those who werent shameless, cried like wimps.
Agreed, that its not good to be entirely shameless, but some shamelessness is required. This world is a bad and cruel place. It contains evil people. Everyday, there are people who will talk harshly to you, hurt your feelings, and sabotage your public image, even if you are doing no wrong. If there are people like that around, its quite ok to be shameless.

Cleanliness mania..

Ever wondered whom to blame for, your mom's cranky and ever paranoid nature, at certain times? Blame it all on house cleaning and keeping. Its otherwise, hard for me to worry about that tiny speck of dirt on the table, or shoes kept out of their fixed position in the shoe cabinet, or the slightly tilted photoframe hanging on the wall, or the teensy weensy black spot on the white refridgerator !!! However, since the time I am 'home alone', I find myself stepping in mom's shoes of crankiness. I often find myself telling my friends, who come home, that they shouldnt throw their shoes around the place, keep the newspapers in a neat pile or things like that.

The reason being is that whoever does the house cleaning feels the 'pain' when someone jeopardizes the neatness or the orderliness with which things are maintained.

Then of course, the levels of fanatism and tolerance in terms of home cleanliness and tidiness for different people are different.

Cruel world.

There are times when you feel totally dejected at certain 'aspects' in life. You always try to forget them, saying to yourself what good will it do by remembering them? But they keep coming back to haunt you. At times you'll feel that it would have been so good if it was different. You dream about the difference. But in reality, aspects of this nature never change. People are 'kind' enough to bring those depressing matters again and again and keep reminding you what you are trying to forget. So it is difficult for you to forget at all. Especially if they are brought on by people who you trust the most to understand your feelings. These are the wounds which never heal. You carry them off as permanent scars. Nobody will support your views. Nobody can understand them. Nobody will understand this post, and what it is about, anyway. Sob !! Its a cruel world.

As days go by......Home alone.

Been getting used to a new life lately. A life of living home alone. Living alone has its upsides and downsides. Upsides include some factors like getting an 'off' from everyone's nagging and pestering. You are your own master, you are at no one's mercy. Do what you like, eat what you want to, sleep whenever you want to. You can play the music at loud volumes, scream and sing, shout all you want. You can even dance naked, run around the house wearing only underwears and throw your clothes here and there (Please dont think, that I would do all this stuff. I am only saying that when you are alone, it is practically possible to all this stuff !!).
If you are going to live alone for a long time...........the above upsides will eventually lead you to doom !!! (Yeah, but not all, i guess, eg nothing would happen if you continue running around the house wearing underwears. As long as you are alone, its not a problem!!!)
I'll not talk about the downsides..........cause there are many............one of them namely....loneliness. It can be a killer. I'll write about the other downsides when I start realising what they are, as my days go by, home alone.

Be who you are and say what you feel.

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind."

Have read this quite a bit of times now. It seems to appear on many websites, blogs, calendars, inspirational novels and management books. Nice saying. I tend to agree to it and tend to be like that.....most of the times.

A pouring out of frustration.

There are some people in this world who, I wish, would shut up and mind their own bloody business. They have this infuriating habit of poking their nose into matters which are strictly out of their territory. Its one thing to be mildy curious and another to be overtly inquisitive. Also, I would like to tell some of these 'some people', one day that, they should not mix personal and professional life and keep the two apart. A fellow I know, seems to be judging how my personal life would be, based on his experiences of my professional workmanship. He even has the nerve of telling me his totally inaccurate conclusions. If it were not for the fact that my hands are tied right now, I would give him a piece of my mind in the form of an angry retort. The bastard. He tends to think that he is the 'coolest dude' which is quite untrue, in fact quite contradictory. If he was the coolest, I think the definition of 'cool' itself would change. Right now, I wish that he has an upset stomach 24 X 7 till he drops faint in his own pool of poo. Yeah, that was disgusting, but then you have an idea about how disgusted I am, by his behaviourial characteristics.

3 awesome photos.

Given below are three of some 'interesting' snaps, which have been captured by me or my shutterbug friends........Thought I'd put them on the blog and write something about it......

The above is a picture taken by one of my best friends, KC. Its a truly fantastic snap. The story goes that the lady who lives next door to KCs place, had to go outstation , and had her son draw this 'poster'.Maybe, the lady did not have the time to inform the milkman who delivers milk at her place. This 'simple representation', which is placed between the metal grill of the front door, makes it amply clear that milk is NOT to be delivered !!! A huge NO MILK sign, a cow below it (who gives milk, as we all know!!) and an arrow towards what seems to be a plastic bag in which milk is delivered !!! An amazing imaginative piece of drawing by a boy !!!

'JANTS' toilet.

Spelling mistake. Its ok. Everyone is not perfect in english after all. And it conveys the meaning does'nt it? Afterall, who'll look at the grammar and spelling sign if mother nature calls urgently?

And why is this grown-up man standing in a plastic bucket? Does he think its funny? The reality is, he is collecting trash from dustbins and then throwing them into that big blue bucket. When the bucket is filled to its full capacity, the man stands on the trash, forcing it down further, so that more trash can be added to the bucket !!! This photo is taken by another of my best friends, Rohan, who captured this snap at the time when office boys collect trash from all the dustbins in office.

Gifts

One of my friends recently chatted with me. The chatting session seemed to be perfectly normal until, she suddenly tells me that she has a friend who is a male, whom she wants to give a gift to. This question threw me off track. I've never given a gift to a person of the opposite sex. How do you choose a gift ?

SS: Ravi tell me something normally what gift can a girl give a boy whos her friend?

Me(I was thrown off track, couldnt think of an answer, and wondered why she asked me instead of all the knowledgable people and great romeos in the world? !!) : i could ask u the same vice versa question sometime later.............but right now i will only try to answer ur query.........., however let me think.........

SS: Let us suppose that I want to gift u something, what kind of gift would u like to have from me?

Me (still stumped): Well actually......let me think, are u giving it to this boy...........ur potential suitor? or a friend? or a potential suitor as a friend?

SS: Only a friend, I told u didnt I? dumbo........this is in no way related to my matrimony!!

Me (trying to buy time) : Do u want to surprise him?

SS: Maybe yes

Me: Ok if its a surprise its real tough (ya, when have I thot of giving a gift? let alone a surprise gift?) .......... coz boys are rarely surprised (huh? what? what a stupid statement !!) ..........but let me think.........dont give him perfume ok..............watever u do.......... he'll take the wrong meaning!! (Now I started telling what not to gift.............its always a good strategy when you dont what is to be done...You can start on the things which are NOT to be done, coz you might know those better!!!. )

SS : Why?

Me (Thinking): This .........why?.......... just proves that ur real stupid birdbrain

SS: Still, if I give him a branded one? It will be good no?

Me: No ...........

SS: Anyway tell me what to give and not what not to give

Me(Thinking) :She has realised my strategy !!

Me: You can buy him a wrist watch.

SS: Another option

Me: Ok. that wasnt a good option ..........wrist watch.............

SS: Give me options no.........

Me: Ya ok...............its just that i cant think of any...........

Me: You can give the boy a backpack...........a cool branded one.......... adidas or reebok.........

SS: I dont prefer tat as gift

Me: Do u prefer flowers?

SS : No

SS: Because, I feel it is waste of money.

Me: ok..........

Me: Give him a cool looking formal shirt. You shud know his size of course........

SS: How will I know that? Like for example I want to buy a shirt for you, how do I know your size?

Me: You could ask some other friend who knows u and him............He'll know your friends size, isnt it?

SS: Too complicated, tell me something else........

Me (Thinking): She wants to give a surprise gift to this friend of hers, doesnt want it to be personal, still give him something useful, doesnt know his specifications and on top of that, asks me, of all the people, for an opinion, and then cancels out each of my best options!!)

Me: I will think and tell you tommorow..........If I meet you online !!! Right now, I am signing out!!!

Simply amazing bit of chat !!!!